Episode One-Hundred-and-Three: Malta Eurobowl/Europen

Would you believe it, it’s only the blimming Eurobowl, that it is. Twelfman was the only member of the podcast to go, which left us with two options.

  1. Let Twelfman ramble on for like two long, lonely hours, or
  2. Invite a guest.

So, welcome Volkajo, AKA Timo! He is our special guest and has prepared a special BloodBlusters quiz… Oh me oh my oh goodness.

Also, go to the SKABB tournament, Pissed Up Terry Testimonial: Here!

00:00:00 – Eurobowl! Europen! Malta!

01:57:20 – Volkajo’s Bloodblusters

02:47:00 – End

Patreon Link: https://www.patreon.com/ABAOpodcast

Shirts and Stuff: https://teespring.com/en-GB/stores/abao

ps! Twelfman’s book is now out. You can buy it! Or, not. Whatever you want. Look, forget I mentioned it okay? Find it here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Advocatus-R-Turner-ebook/dp/B09L31CMKQ/

What could go wrong?


Episode One-Hundred-and-Three: Malta Eurobowl/Europen

PS: The charity album can be found here:


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Twelfman’s Eurobowl 2022 Writeup

Due to that dreaded virus, the last Eurobowl that was due to be held in Poland was sadly cancelled. This year, however, Eurobowl was back in full swing, and it was being held on the island nation of Malta.

I was to be travelling as a part of one of the Europen teams representing Wales. What is the Europen? Nothing, what’s europenning with you? Wait…


For those who can’t be bothered to click (and who can blame you? We are all but grains passing through life’s limited hourglass) the Europen is the sister tournament to Eurobowl. It’s limited to one-team-per-country; in fact, you don’t even need to be a country to compete. It’s open to any group of four people who want to play together on the big stage.

Wales was taking one Eurobowl team and three Europen teams. I was captain of the perhaps unimaginatively named Team Wales Europen team, and was bringing my good ol’ boney boys: Khemri (or Tomb Kings for you whippersnappers). They are without doubt my best team, and the team I enjoy the most, so why not?

(PS: All the rosters as well as some fascinating data analysis can be found here, courtesy of Sann0638 : https://public.tableau.com/app/profile/mike.sann0638.davies/viz/Eurobowl22/Introduction)

The roster I brought was my standard 1150 roster of Two Re-rolls Fifteen Players, which is sort of insane, I admit, but I still rate it. You need warm bodies on the pitch (well, not warm exactly) with Khemri, and this is the best way to guarantee that. Fifteen players gives you an awful lot to work with. You can set up 4 TGs in reserve on Turn 8 to stop any officious ref nonsense, you can foul to your heart’s content, and if you do happen to take an absolute drubbing, you can still set up with a full eleven players. More on that later… Two rerolls is risky, sure, but if you play carefully and calmly, it’s often enough. Uh, more on that later as well.

Skill wise, I went 4x Guard Guardians (because anything else is insane), 2x Block Throw-ras (mini-blitzers, plus very helpful on defence) and for my last skills, which could either be a single and a double, or two stacked singles, I took a Tackle/Mighty Blow Blitz-ra. I couldn’t resist.

My team was Dementor, who was taking High Elves with a thick spread of Dodge. High Elves were competitive in this ruleset, and were represented widely. Orcster was bringing Slann, with a Block Kroxigor and a scatter of other skills (but no Strip Ball! Madness? Genius? Read on, dear reader…) Lastly was Fallingdownjoe with his Dark Elves, which had a bunch of Dodge Blitzers and a pair of Witches, one with Block and one with Wrestle. A reliable, steadfast roster that has the ability to do very well if coached skilfully.

My journey involved a late-night drive to Oxford, followed by a 3.30am alarm (sob) and 4am pickup from Eynsham to Gatwick for an 8am flight, which was delayed for three hours while the plane was on the tarmac. The flight itself was around three hours as well, so that was a long time sat on that plane. Oh well! Joe and I had taken our Nintendo Switches and spent most of it playing Mario Kart. If Joe says he beat me consistently and often, just know he’s a damn liar, and I was robbed.

Me winning. Ignore any further races or results.

We arrived in Malta a little miffed, very hungry but still excited. The weather was beautiful, the scenery picturesque and the hotel was fantastic. The hotel was absolutely stuffed full of Blood Bowlers of all nationalities. At first, I was a little unsure about the fact you had to buy your hotel along with your tourney ticket, thinking it seemed a big unfair to those who didnt want to stay in the hotel. Then it hit me just how well this was being run. It was when I had just finished hanging out with all these BBers in the evening, had dinner together, had breakfast the next day, then got on the bus together to arrive at the venue together. We were being well looked after, and the sense of community that was being fostered was immense. I had nothing to worry about in terms of food or transport. And, every evening, without even having to leave the hotel, I could hang out with even more Blood Bowlers until I wanted to go to bed. The organisers really pulled it out of the bag, and I applaud them for it. Well done guys. Even the event itself was run incredibly smoothly. Lunch tickets were handed out during the games, along with score cards. While entering score cards on paper seems old fashioned, the reality of it was that from where I was standing, I saw no blips or errors or bottlenecks, just good Blood Bowly fun. Saying that, there was a redraw at one point, but that’s because a particular individual who shall not be named wrote a 1 that looked like a 2. I don’t know how either.

Back to the night before…. When it came to the food, I stacked my plate high. How high? An American I was hanging out with thought it was such a big plate that he bet me a drink that I couldn’t finish it all.

An American.

Anyway, one drink up, I went to bed buzzing to be representing Team Wales on the continent in the official Europen team.

Day One

After a big breakfast we all queued up to get on the coach that picked us up from the hotel and made our way to the venue. Now, on our team, we had a fifth secret member: Gethin, the Dragon. Whoever was performing the best had to wear him. As I was captain, that meant I wore him in game one (I never wore him again…)

The venue was spacey, bright, full of life, and tingling with potential Blood Bowl victories. I took my team aside and gave them a pep talk, as was my duty, where I threatened them with actual physical violence if they didn’t win. Well, not quite. I told them that I didn’t care if they won or lost. I said if you’re going to win, win well, and if you’re going to lose, lose well. I don’t want to be sitting opposite a Spanish, Greek or Hungarian coach in the bar one year and them to remember playing against Team Wales, and remembering them being a sore loser or boorish winner. I told them to have fun, do their best, and win or lose with grace. Then we got to it. The Eurobowl had begun.

Game One : Snotling ~ LordBertoCaos (NAF Rating 159.71) || Squad: Predatori MORE POW

LordBertoCaos (Gianluca) was part of an Italian team from Florence, which was being captained by British_Dog, a lovely chap who completely wrecked me 4-0 in the World Cup. So you could say I was itching for revenge a little…

Now, I’ll play anyone with anything when I’ve got my Khemri. Amazons? Fine. Undead? No issue. Dwarves, Chorfs, Dark Elves, Orcs, you bring it I’ll play it, and feel I have a good chance of winning. Bring a stunty team however, and then I get nervous. They’re too unpredictable, and can exploit the Khemri weakesses so easily; that is, disruption, infiltration, frustration and utter chaos.

Gianluca had brought a simple roster. Two Trolls, Two Bombers with Accurate, Snotlings up to 14, Three Bribes, Three Rerolls. Oh, and Morg’n’Thorg. Ulp. This roster terrified me. Bombers can absolutely wreck Khemri, who, with the new rules, might find it hard to throw a bomb back even if they miraculously catch it. Two of them with Accurate was a recipe for destruction. So I had to spread my players out, right? Easy. Except I couldn’t, because Morg would pick ’em off, one at a time, with his MB+2 ripping me a new blow-hole. So I had to clump up, right? Except the bombers… you get the idea.

I did two practice games for this, as we knew the rosters before hand, and in both of them I got utterly steamrolled. I went in thinking if I got a draw, I’d be damn lucky.

I elected to kick, which is not what I normally do, but what my training buddy (Joe) advised I do. The first turn was quite good, actually, The bomb missed, and Morg flubbed his block. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad?

Then I got utterly blasted for six turns on the bounce, as expected! Morg was a monster. Throughout the game, he killed two Tomb Guardians and KO’d another, plus killing my Tackle Blitz-Ra and one of my Throw-Ra’s, and the combo of him and the bombs KO’d or killed a few Skeletons. There was very little I could do except laugh through the pain. At one point, when it was clear I was simply not going to stop this bloody Snotling from scoring, I decided to spend all my energy on trying to kill Morg. I swarmed him and knocked him down with my Tackle/MB guy, and rolled a 9 on the armour. So close…

So I fouled him as well. Broke armour, and rolled an 8 on the injury. So, so close!

Anyway, I got totally smooshed and he scored on turn 8. In my opponent’s defence, I was removing Snotlings whenever I hit them, and he was playing exactly right. My two Guardians regenerated (thank goodness) and my KO’d TG came back, but the others stayed off. A failed bribe for a bomber didn’t really mean much, as he had two more bribes and still two Bombers.

I was setting up with 11 still, with 0 players in reserves. Thank goodness for my deep, deep bench… I had only one Block player left, a Throw-Ra, so this game was going to get interesting.

So I set up and crossed my fingers that I could score. Morg streamrollered towards my only ball-carrying potential positional, and I tried my best to fend him off while threatening the bombers. It was not easy. The play of the game has to be one of the next two turns. I marked Morg with three players to keep him busy, but at the start of Gianluco’s turn, a laser-guided bomb took all three of them down, leaving Morg completely unharmed, and a free line to my ball carrier richer. Uh oh. My opponent decided to run a snotling over to mark my BC and make the blitz 3d, but to my relief he snake-eyes’d the GFI. Thank goodness.

These guys used to be standing up.

I then tried to make my ball safe, which was almost impossible, but was reasonably happy. Then a bomb flew in from literally one square away and took out the ball carrier, but the ball bounced onto a TG who caught it. I saw that I had one possible avenue of escape. In a display of elfy-heroism, my Tomb Guardian charged a mighty 6 squares away and handed the ball off to a skeleton, who made a break for it. A single Snotling was the only player in range, who marked him, and my Skeleton had just to make a 3d blitz to victory… thankfully it all paid off, and I equalised in turn 15. The Throw Team-Mate failed and I wiped sweat from my eyes and thanked my lucky stars for the draw.

Yes, that is a bomber two squares from my ball carrier. Yes, I am nervous.

The team did very well this round, and we walked away with a team win. Nice!

Result: 1-1 Draw, 2-6 Cas || Team Win

It was then lunch for the Europen guys, and I had some pasta. I’m not sure what else to say about it. It was tasty, I suppose, but I wish I had had more! But then I am a glutton, so…

Game Two : Slann ~ SickAsEggs (NAF Rating 143.5) || Squad : A MASSIVE MALTA UP

(The word ‘Malta’ in the name was originally the name of a type of male clucking bird, but they were asked to change it. Boo, hiss, etc)

Slann vs Khemri is a funny one. On one hand, you have the best team in the game for cracking cages (well, second best now, after vampires… but who knows what the future brings?) against the team that is the best at making cages (or at least the team that has precisely zero other option). What’s nice with my roster is I tend to have zero Dodge (sorry, Tackle!), Sure Hands (sorry, Strip Ball!) and more Guard than you can shake a bunch of sticks at, meaning it’s very hard for Slann to jump in and wreck face. It was against Sann0638 (Slann0638, surely?) in which a last-ditch 2d uphill block sacked the ball because I didn’t have Block on my Throw-Ras, which is now why I never leave home without it.

SickAsEggs (also called Alex, which was unhelpful as we had another Alex on the team already) had a well-rounded Slann-without-Kroxigor roster, as below. A wide range of skills, including Wrestle, Guard and Kick was a scary proposition.

I received on the first drive, and if I remember right got a touchback, despite Kick, which was helpful. The new changing weather means it becomes much more likely. I did the standard Khemri thing of grinding my way up the pitch, hitting frogs and howling bloody murder. I remember Alex making very few leaps, as high-level Slann coaches will do, saving their re-rolls until the one crucial turn. Unfortunately for Alex, the Khemri Pain Train had no brakes, and his crucial leaps flopped, so I ran it in on turn 8.

Alex had no re-rolls, so I cockily set up with the standard single-line defence, leaving my TGs off on the sidelines. I then watched in horror as he set up expertly for the One Turn Touchdown, only remembering too late that, yes, Slann can do it, and if you can get the pushes right, can leap right over a single stupid line of idiot skeletons. Oh balls.

He positioned his Guard well and I can’t remember exactly but might have gotten a High Kick, but flubbed the catch. The series of blocks he made were perfect and well-engineered, and before I knew it his Catcher was in scoring range. Oh dear. Thankfully, the changes in passing hit Slann particularly hard, and even their AG2+ Catchers are passing on a measly 4+, meaning he’d need a 6+, which he did not make. Whew.

At the start of the second drive, after (I think) a Riot, Alex stormed up the pitch for an early score, and I was unable to stop him. However, that did leave me a good five turns to score back, and the removals really started happening. I think I lost a Guardian but he regenerated, but frogmen don’t have that luxury… his Wrestle and Guard pieces were gone, along with a Catcher, meaning all Alex had left was optimistic 2D uphill blocks and hoping for the best. Nuffle heard his prayers but denied him.

Weirdly, there was another Khemri on Slann game in the round, with Orcster facing the formidable Volkajo. He and I are rivals in Khemri supremacy, right next to each other in the global ratings. I did hear some terrible rumours of his Khemri making dodges and random Blitz-Ra pickups, to which I tutted and shook my head. You’d never see me doing that. Nope.

The team managed another win! We were therefore on two wins, and very happy to be so.

Result: 2-1 win, 3-2 Cas || Team Win

Game Three : Orcs ~ spob (NAF Rating 158.86) || Squad: Team Waterbowl

Steven, or spob, was playing with Team Waterbowl. They were from the UK, just like we were, which meant of course that we had to win at any cost. He was playing with Orcs. Not Black Orcs, honest-to-goodness ordinary Orcs, what with their MV5 Bigguns and their, uh, well that’s about it. Spob had taken a strong roster, with 12 players including the Goblin or cheeky one-turn-touchdown potential. A smattering of Block on the Bigguns and Guard on the Blitzers, plus a Guard troll, meant I was in for a slog-fest. He also took a Tackle Blitzer, but the best part about playing Khemri is giving your opponent a smug look when they announce they have Tackle. Then you usually lose because you’re playing Khemri. Anyhoo…

I received again, and started punching in standard Khemri style. It got a little close and cramped, but that is exactly where I want my Khemri to be. What really helped is I gave the Troll a Skeleton to hang out with, and he did, dutifully failing to achieve much other than stare this Skeleton down. This meant he had no real counter to the Khemri Beef Bus, and was able to force my way down. I also crowd-surfed a Biggun, which died, which helped. Steven later reflected that he should have used his Troll more, freeing him up an d throwing him into the melee, and I agree. I had such a deep bench that I was happy to park a Skeleton on him for the whole game if needed, every drive.

In the second half, my armour and injury dice exploded, and Orcs crumpled like soggy Elves. I killed another Biggun and a Blitzer just on random blocks, followed by the Troll, and poor Steve had no chance. Normal teams might feel guilty about murdering an Orc team using nothing but dice, but, as Pratchett said, guilt is an emotion, and for emotions you need glands. Khemri have no glands.

The team won again! I had gone into the weekend hoping that we might walk away with a positive record, but to be ending day one on THREE wins was far more than I had dreamed of. Well done team, including Joe, who was on three individual wins. Wahey!

Result: 1-0 Win, 3-2 Cas || Team Win

So ended Day One. I was on 2/1/0, which I was dead happy with, and the team was on a mighty three wins. That meant we were getting dangerously close to the top tables, and there were some very good coaches milling about…

Anyway, we all did the sensible thing then and went back to the bar to drink heavily, eat enormously, and lounge by the pool. It’s a hard life, being a Blood Bowl player…

Day Two

The Welsh Europen teams on their way to Day Two.

Game Four : Chaos Renegades ~ Dark_Duke (NAF Rating 173.19) || Squad: TBBL

Pay no attention to the hot-dog hat. That is the face of a stone-cold killer.

This roster made me laugh when my opponent explained it to me. Can you see what the problem is?

That’s right, a Juggernaut Troll. Despite Ignatio wanting a Juggernaut Minotaur like a sensible human being, he had accidentally submitted his roster incorrectly. Like a true hero, he took it on the chin and carried on regardless, proudly declaring that his Troll had Juggernaut, big deal, you got something to say about it? Thought not. His roster otherwise had a lot of prongs to this swiss army knife of a team. Pact is always an interesting matchup. Their big guys are better but less numerous, more flexible but less reliable.

I received again (which I’m very happy with) and decided that in order to win, I had to beat up his big dudes and out-strength him. It all started so well…

I ran out of rerolls by my turn four, which happens, but it still makes things interesting. They were both on blocks, one being a 3d and one being a 2d. The actual final reroll was eaten by a Tomb Guardian hitting the Wrestle Skaven as my first block of the turn.


Just like the rest of you fine people, I have been known to say things like “I’ve never seen so many 1’s”, or “That’s the most casualties I’ve ever seen in turn one.” But. And I’m not exaggerating here. What followed was the most amount of Double Skulls I have ever seen.

It started with that Skull/Skull reroll Skull/BD. Ignatio didn’t use Wrestle (correct play) and I had a turnover. He moved a few guys around, realised he couldn’t break though my wall of dudes, then ended turn. I thought about it, stood up my Tomb Guardian, threw another, three die this time, block, and Double Skull/BD. Ignatio did a bit more blocking, but still couldn’t break though. I didn’t even stand a guy up, but blocked with a Block piece this time. Guess what? Double skull. I actually starting taking photos this time. It started to get bad. I had an Orc and a Skaven next to my ball carrier. I tried to free him up, and guess what… Double skull. Oof.

You can watch it in real time over twitter…

Miraculously, Ignatio didn’t manage to sack the ball and score, thank Nuffle, so I changed my trousers and went into the second half 0-0 down. The second half was a real slogger, with my block and injury dice finally waking up and going to town. I KO’d the Troll and lost a Tomb Guardian in return. I killed the Skaven and kept stunning the Mino. Ignatio didn’t have a way through, and was rapidly losing players. It was soon apparent that he wasn’t going to be able to score, meaning I had to think. By this point, the other three games in our round had finished, one win, one draw, one loss apiece. That meant that whatever happened in this game, this drive, would determine the team’s outcome for the round. No pressure then…

I counted some squares and made a check of where the ball was. The Elf still had it, and I didn’t have anyone in range, not since one of my Throw-Ras was eaten by an Ogre. It was going to be a draw.

But wait. Hang on a second.

I had one player in range. My Throw-Ra. But he didn’t have enough movement to go back, get the ball, and run it in. It would require a Khemri coach’s worst nightmare.

Ball handling.

The ball was between the Mino and the Elf, in both of their TZs I had a few guys around it. What followed was a tense string of one die blocks, one of them using my last reroll, to free up TZs from the ball. Then, as my Blitz-Ra was now no longer able to help, since the 1dBs were not knock-downs, I had one option left. I dodged with a Skeleton, made the pickup, made two GFis, handed off to the Throw-Ra, who caught it, then ran in for 1-0 on turn 16. All with no rerolls.

My opponent took it very well (I think he had to, after my first half!), and we hugged it out. That meant, though, that the team had gone 2/1/1, so another team win. WTF!

Result: 1-0 Win, 1-1 Cas || Team Win

The ball was in the square by the Tomb Guardian. The Skeleton with the ball was being marked by the human with the red base.

Also, next to me, Orcster’s Slann got obliterated by Morg. However, he stole the draw by making the big man trip up with Diving Tackle on turn 8. Who said Blitzers are useless?

Game Five : Shambling Undead ~ bourpif (NAF Rating 215.94) || Squad: COCORIPOW

After another lunch that was on the lower end of the impressive spectrum, we had finally made it to the top table, and on round five(!) We were up against a French team of players normally found on the Eurobowl team, and the other other Europen team on 4 wins. This was going to be tough…

Proof we were on top table. See! You can’t fake photos on the internet, so it must be true.

I was facing their captain, Bourpif, and his undead. (I played against four captains this weekend, by the way. We have a way of magnetically attracting each other.) His roster was fairly typical high-level Undead:

Nothing outstandingly terrifying for me, but even an Undead team with few skills (comparatively) is still a tough prospect, and with a coach as good on paper as Bourpif, I knew this was probably going to be the hardest matchup of the tourney for me.

He won the kick and elected to receive (curse him!) and prepared to push his cage down. I spent one turn waiting for him, let him pick a lane, then on turn two, took a risk, and charged most of my players into his offence. My thinking is that if I let him pick and poke at my defence, he’ll find a weak spot, and use his superior mobility to run past me at the last moment. So I didn’t give him that option. I overwhelmed his team with huge amounts of Guard and strength, making him have to abandon any plans he had before and instead work to extricate himself from this situation. It all looked so good…

My main issue was that I burnt both of my re-rolls in a single turn, turn two. The first was a Double Skull, which I just couldn’t afford. Then I did a block with a TG – only two dice, but it would have shut off an entire string of blocks – and that was also a Skull/BD. I thought about that one for a long time, but elected to re-roll. Ultimately, a re-roll here could make the difference between stopping the drive and losing my team. It paid off, and Simon had to really take a risk and break through with a Ghoul, with only a Ghoul and a Wight to help the ball carrier. He sideline caged, and I planned to swamp him, and started off by and charged him with my Tackle/MB Blitz-Ta, but Double Skulled again… drat! Simon was able to run it in without any problem then, but I did manage to kill a Ghoul and a Wight for my troubles.

On my drive, I said to myself that I’d go for the draw unless I killed every Ghoul, which I didn’t do… So I played for the draw. My armour dice caught fire and I started ripping the Undead team apart. It was not hard to grind down when I had such a healthy player advantage. There was one turn where it could have gone wrong, and on turn 16 Simon really pulled out an amazing turn in which all of my players ended up being marked, including the ball carrier, but I was able to free him up and score on turn 16. All in all, a really good match that I was happy to draw.

The team suffered our first defeat! We had a record of 0/2/2. Special shout out to Orcster for losing a game due to a werewolf picking up on a 6, and also to Dementor for snatching a fantastic draw from the jaws of certain defeat.

Result 1-1 Draw, 2-3 Cas || Team Loss

Game Six : Humans ~ dreamscreator (NAF Rating 186.49) || Team Spain

The final round…. We were on 4/0/1. The French team who beat up were on 5/0/0, so our dreams of 1st place were rapidly dwindling. However, we did way better than I could have hoped, so I was chuffed as nuts. All I wanted now was a good, fun game to end my Europen on.

I couldn’t have chosen a better opponent to play my last game against. Hugo is a very dear friend of mine. In fact, we were in the same team in the 2019 World Cup. Since he had left Blighty to head back to Spain, I haven’t seen him anywhere near as much as I would like. So to finish such an event with a match against such an old friend warmed my heart.

Unfortunately, he’s also a damn good player. Drat!

(Ready to take on the world in Dornbirn, 2019 We’re the two on the right.)

With Bonus Added Sann0638, At No Extra Charge!
Who needs top table, eh?

I am used to playing versus his Orcs, so to see him switch sides and join the Human side surprised me. He had as much Guard as I did! Now, that simply won’t do…

He elected to kick to me (hooray!) and I won a Prayer to Nuffle. A random Skeleton got the Stab skill for the whole game (cool, I guess!), and he spent the whole game trying and failing to stab people. He did get one good stab in, but nothing really happened from it. It was just funny. There was one turn where Hugo had to make a block that would leave his Ogre in contact with Stabby Jim, and it made him nervous… mwehehehe.

Anyway, I ground up the pitch in true Khemri style. My overwhelming strength advantage was solidified when I fouled his Ogre off the pitch. It was quite funny. I killed a random Lineman, and Hugo used his Apo to keep him in reserves, then I immediately knocked his Ogre down and fouled it into the KO box. I’m nice like that, especially to my old friends.

Despite his best attempts, I was able to walk it in on turn 8. Now, having learned from the Slann game in round two, I set up to defend against the OTTD as best as I could.I also realised Hugo had saved two re-rolls just for this turn. Thankfully, his Ogre was still KO’d, so he couldn’t throw a Halfling, but there are more than one ways to OTTD with Humans…

I watched with mounting terror as he made every block with mechanical accuracy, pushing his Catcher with expert manoeuvring into scoring range. Then I watched the Thrower pick it up, jog over to the catcher… who failed the catch, even with the reroll. Whew!!!

The Ogre woke up, so both teams were back to full strength for the second half. I was really lucky in that I had suffered precisely zero removals against me, and this was a trend that continued. Hugo could not catch a break. However, he was able to score in two turns, and with a Riot, that meant the pressure was piling on for me to turn this draw into a win.

I tried to get through all these pesky Humans, but couldn’t quite get the result I was hoping for. Hugo then started to play more risky, as he also wanted the win. He threw lots of 1dBs, whuch started off failing, then starting working. He started dodging, which starting off working, then started failing… It was tense. After a stupid 2dB that I shouldn’t have made failed, Hugo capitalised and managed to get a 1db on my Ball Carrier, knocking him down. The ball bounced into the waiting arms of a Human Blitzer. Oh no!

I had to think. After about 5 minutes of the hamster running, I saw a way out… but it was janky. Long story short, it paid off, and the ball was down again, and in my hands. But too much time had been wasted, and the only chance I had of scoring was about six 5+ dodges in a row, and Nuffle had already blessed me with an unlikely win today, so the game ended in a draw that I think we were both happy with. We ended up swapping shirts and I left with a big, stupid smile on my face.

The team managed to get another win! That meant we were on 5/0/1, and in with a real chance of runner up…

Result: 1-1 Draw, 3-0 Cas || Team Win

Sadly, it was not to be. We came joint 2nd on team points, but lost out on 2nd on tiebreakers. Team Waterbowl came second in the end, and the French Team who beat up won with 6/0/0. We were gutted to miss out second, but still elated that we did so well. Our SoS was the higest of the tournament, so we’d had a real tough time getting there, but we held our own and did Wales proud.

Full results both Eurobowl and Europen, Group and Individual, can be found here: http://eurobowl.eu/2022/default.asp?p=37. Congratulations to the Danes for winning the Eurobowl, and to the French for winning the Europen.

Also, I asked Janninu if we could all sing Happy Birthday to Quackerz (Jack), one of the guys on one of the other Welsh teams, and Orcster’s son – who turned 19 that day. So we did, of course… hehehe.

Special shout out to Joe who came 10th overall with a sterling 4/1/1 record. I myself went 3/3/0, and came 20th.

I was delighted to have managed to pass through the event without losing a game, and to have met so many new friends. My Khemri ranking went up 10.46pts to 213.66, putting me the 4th highest rated Khemri player in, er, the world. Bloody hell!!

In summary, what an event. It was run so amazingly well by the admin team. They should be so, so proud of what they have done. Well done guys.

Here’s a video the organisers took which I recommend you check out, for it includes both the awards ceremony and us all singing happy birthday to Quackerz: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2JCLe7nikM

Here’s to the next one!

Cymru am byth!

Episode One-Hundred-and-Two: Zon and On, Anon

Amazons are all new and stuff! They’ve redone them, and are they more interesting? Yes! Are they better? Debateable! Why not have a listen and hear what is sure to be a riveting and amenable diversion?

Also, check out https://www.docminiature.co.uk/. We’ll be hosting a giveaway of some of their stuff in the coming weeks, but don’t let that stop you from having a nosey at their fine wares.

Also also, go have a look at the West Middenland Open, run by a mate of ours: https://www.facebook.com/groups/5963964380290012/

00:00:00 – Magic the Gathering Warhammer Blood Bowl Crossover Discussion

00:41:22 – Amazon Discussion

02:01:00 – End

Patreon Link: https://www.patreon.com/ABAOpodcast

Shirts and Stuff: https://teespring.com/en-GB/stores/abao

ps! Twelfman’s book is now out. You can buy it! Or, not. Whatever you want. Look, forget I mentioned it okay? Find it here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Advocatus-R-Turner-ebook/dp/B09L31CMKQ/

What could go wrong?


Episode One-Hundred-and-Two: Zon and On, Anon

PS: The charity album can be found here:


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Episode One-Hundred-and-One: COBBBL’d Together

Whoops! We’re actually talking about Amazons NEXT week. That will learn me for messing with the space-time continuum. This week we’re talking COBBBL Bloodbath 2022, a tournament that took place over in Bath.

Amazons are all new and stuff! They’ve redone them, and are they more interesting? Yes! Are they better? Debateable! Why not have a listen and hear what is sure to be a riveting and amenable diversion?

00:00:00 – Amazon COBBBL Bloodbath Discussion

01:34:00 – End

Patreon Link: https://www.patreon.com/ABAOpodcast

Shirts and Stuff: https://teespring.com/en-GB/stores/abao

ps! Twelfman’s book is now out. You can buy it! Or, not. Whatever you want. Look, forget I mentioned it okay? Find it here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Advocatus-R-Turner-ebook/dp/B09L31CMKQ/

What could go wrong?


Episode One-Hundred-and-One: COBBBL’d Together

PS: The charity album can be found here:


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Episode One-Hundred: Reunion!

Oh my stars and garters. Can you believe it? We’re a hundred episodes old! I remember back in the days when we recorded on nothing but an old shoe. Modern podcasters don’t know they’re born…

We welcome back Merrick and HungDonkeyman into this episde to talk about life, the universe and craneflies. There’s Bloodblusters, there’s quizzes, there’s all sorts of shenanigans.

Oh! Also, we’re on YouTube now! We recorded this one with cameras and everything, so you can watch our gurning ugly mugs while we talk. You can find it on this link here: https://youtu.be/O-O6g3hbkL8

00:00:00 – So much stuff!

01:16:26 – Bloodblusters

01:48:06ish – End

Patreon Link: https://www.patreon.com/ABAOpodcast

Shirts and Stuff: https://teespring.com/en-GB/stores/abao

ps! Twelfman’s book is now out. You can buy it! Or, not. Whatever you want. Look, forget I mentioned it okay? Find it here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Advocatus-R-Turner-ebook/dp/B09L31CMKQ/

What could go wrong?


Episode One-Hundred: Reunion!

PS: The charity album can be found here:


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Episode Ninety-Nine (version 2.0): Milestone Approaching!


It’s almost here! The big one! To get you all ready for excitement, we’re talking Thrud and various other tournaments. Oh, and all the cool stuff we have planned for next episode… Speaking of which:

We’re giving away an orc team! (Courtesy of Printed Players, go check them out and use our special code (ABAO10) https://www.etsy.com/shop/PrintedPlayers)¬†

How do you win it? Easy. Tell us your favourite moment of the podcast from the last 100 episodes. We will judge it and decide on air. Who is ‘we’? I’m glad you asked.

Next episode we’re bringing back every previous host to talk shit about Blood Bowl! Merrick, Hung, Knightly! We’ll all be here, and it’s gonna be nuts.

We’re also going to be doing some dice soon. Watch this space…

00:00:00 – So much stuff!

02:08:50ish – End

Patreon Link: https://www.patreon.com/ABAOpodcast

Shirts and Stuff: https://teespring.com/en-GB/stores/abao

ps! Twelfman’s book is now out. You can buy it! Or, not. Whatever you want. Look, forget I mentioned it okay? Find it here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Advocatus-R-Turner-ebook/dp/B09L31CMKQ/

What could go wrong?


Episode Ninety-Nine: Milestone Approaching!

PS: The charity album can be found here:


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Episode Ninety-Eight: NAFC 2022

Twelfman is back from his brush with Papa Nurgle, so it’s about bloody time they all talked about how the NAFC went, wouldn’t you say so?

00:00:00 – NAFC

02:10:30ish – End

Patreon Link: https://www.patreon.com/ABAOpodcast

Shirts and Stuff: https://teespring.com/en-GB/stores/abao

ps! Twelfman’s book is now out. You can buy it! Or, not. Whatever you want. Look, forget I mentioned it okay? Find it here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Advocatus-R-Turner-ebook/dp/B09L31CMKQ/

What could go wrong?


Episode Ninety-Eight: NAFC 2022

PS: The charity album can be found here:


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